What is love in the age of terrorism? – NY Psychologist offers advice for 25th anniversary of 9/11

The 25th anniversary of 9/11 was Sept. 11, 2026. Dr. Judy Kuriansky, a noted New York psychologist and trauma expert who provided psychological first aid to survivors and rescuers at Ground Zero, was available to talk about the impact of this marker event on couples and children worldwide.

NEW YORK – In September, as the 25th anniversary of 9/11 loomed, noted New York clinical psychologist Dr. Judy Kuriansky was available to talk about the impact of this marker event on couples and children all over the globe. She could also talk about the concert to honor heroes and survivors in trauma zones, worldwide.

Dr. Judy, as she is fondly known from years of giving advice on radio, TV, the net, and in print, provided mental health support at Ground Zero and the Family Assistance Center after the World Trade Center attacks and was featured in a Red Cross PSA.

Dr. Judy talking points covered questions about:

• What are “Anniversary Reactions?” Reactions around the date of a past traumatic event or emotionally charged episode when individuals re-experience strong symptoms.

• How have relationships changed because of 9/11? In a survey, two-thirds of women and men want more connection with their partner, but others feel life is meaningless, so they withdraw from love and sex and don’t want children. Dr. Judy says to expect opposite reactions: “Come closer” versus “Go away.”
• What are the dangers of the 25th anniversary for couples? Dr. Judy addressed “Couple Trouble” from different coping styles: “Avoiders” who want to escape being reminded about the event versus “Talkers” who want to review every detail and feeling.
• What are ways to make your relationship better on the 9/11 anniversary? Dr. Judy gives tips to spice up your intimacy, including: accept differences; help each other feel safe; hug and hold; do something exciting to trigger chemical releases in the body that stimulate excitement; be creative.
• What is the danger for singles? Some singles may engage in “Terror Sex” or “apocalyptic sex” — casual sex, since “There may not be a future, so why not have a great time now?”  
• What are the dangers for children? Exposed to intense media and public coverage, kids can have nightmares and stomach aches and refuse to go to school.
• How will the 25th anniversary impact people around the world? Helping after many disasters (Hurricane Katrina, the Asian tsunami, bombings in the Middle East, earthquakes in Haiti, China, and Iran), Dr. Judy notes similar reactions.
• What is “guerrilla counseling” after 9/11? People at the site asked Dr. Judy questions, e.g., a man wanted to calm his girlfriend’s fears; a teen needed help for her depressed buddy; a woman wanted to convince her husband they should have another baby.
• Can so much media attention about 9/11 be harmful to people? Yes, past traumatic memories and fears of all kinds can be triggered; if so, seek professional counsel.

 
Her expertise also include:

• Her personal experiences after the attacks, including people she lost and physical problems (breathing, cancer) she developed after inhaling toxins at the “pit,” supervised by the World Trade Center Medical Monitoring Program for first responders.
• Even as an expert mental health professional, she gets her own mental health support related to 9/11.
• Her professional experiences related to 9/11 and how helping changed her life. As a result of this experience, her career and life took on a new perspective. After providing mental health support after 9/11 at Ground Zero, she became a first responder around the globe, from Haiti to Japan, China, Sint Maarten, and even Iran.

• Children are helped by knowing that other kids experiencing trauma care about them. In the Global Kids Connect Project that Dr. Judy founded, art constructions  are exchanged among children who faced disasters all over the world.
• Music heals. An anthem written after 9/11 by Dr. Judy and international composer Russell Daisey called “Towers of Light” honors the heroes and offers hope and healing. Named for the two beams that shine annually over Ground Zero, where the Twin Towers fell, the song has been performed at the World Trade Center Responder Day, United Nations conferences, and the Hiroshima International Peace Summit (where the Dalai Lama called it “very powerful”), and was scheduled to be performed on the 25th anniversary of 9/11 at the iconic St. Mark’s Church in-the-Bowery in New York City.

The song’s 20th-anniversary music video and an account of its history are available online. Kuriansky’s personal and professional reflections on 25 years since Sept. 11 describe her experiences responding to the attacks and other disasters. A music video of the song is at: https://youtu.be/EQHwWP_ajtk?si=Sn6kC2KiarBWzsm4